I See You Baby! UH HUH! Shaking That Thing!

The Arizona Rattlers, a team in the Arena Football League, had a surprise for their fans this halftime performance… A far from bite sized football player breaking it DOWN. Literally died. This is just, YES.

Thanks for giving us a good laugh! I wish I could drop into the splits like MJ… #impressed

Highlights of The Open- On & Off the Course

This past weekend June 16-20th was the British Open, or as Britain likes to call it, The Open. This tournament is golf’s oldest tournament, being around for over 150 years. The Open was founded by pioneering golfers who had one guiding principle – to crown the Champion Golfer of the Year.

Photo: Zach Johnson Twitter

BLAH, BLAH, YADA YADA- Let’s get to the good stuff!

This year, the winner was Zach Johnson (from the United States, whoop whoop ‘MERICUH!).

No, not the Johnson dating ultra babe Paulina Gretzky, but still an American no doubt! God bless America.

It was an unfortunate loss for Jordon Spieth who has already won four times this year, including a pair of playoffs.

 

And if you saw that bomb of a putt Spieth made on sixteen…

Like, damn. Heartbreaker.

Moving on…

There is absolutely no way to talk about The Open without at least touching on defending champion Bubba Watson’s watch game this past weekend.

Photo: USA Today

I am literally talking about the watch you wear on your wrist game.

The 2012 Masters champion has a casual half-million sitting on his wrist, thanks to a pretty sweet deal with Swiss luxury watchmaker, Richard Mille. This watch is the same type of $525,000 watch he wore en route to the green jacket last April.

Sorry but for a half mil, weren’t you expecting it to look way more blingy or something? Maybe that’s just me…

Speaking of some serious cash, there were a lot of bets placed this past weekend. The most outrageous bet made was three million.

THREE. MILLION. DOLLARS.

At the end of the day, to me, golf is just golf.

I love a good athlete, I do. And I’d love to learn how to play golf, but the likelihood of that happening is little to none (it’s an attention span thing… Is it football season yet?).

Thus, I’ll stick to drinking in the club house while my man kicks ass on the course.

 

Cheers to that!

– Alexa

 

Anyone Down for SEXploration? Because Pornhub is Going to Space

PornHub is (wait for it) going to SPACE. Like, as in spaceships and NASA and all that sh*t.

I have no words. Literally. No. Words.

Read that again: PornHub is- Going. To. Space. 

Yep, you read that right. Someone over at the PornHub headquarters had the brilliant (or not so brilliant) idea to take their videos to space. The film will star adult entertainers Eva Lovia and Johnny Sins.

Hmm… I have SO many questions that I don’t even know where to start.

First, let’s talk about how unoriginal this is (sorry, PornHub). PornHub isn’t the first company to have this idea. In 2006, Laura Woodmansee wrote a book called Sex in Space, which detailed the plans to make a porno on the Mir space station (which is no longer around).

Second, logistics. How the f*ck is this supposed to work?!

 

Sex in space cannot be easy. I mean, I’ve never been to space, let alone in a spaceship, so I don’t exactly know what the setting would look like or how things would work out, but I cannot imagine things would be simple. I mean, physics… Then again, I’m not even sure I passed that class.

Regardless! I can image those who are into the whole bondage thing would really dig this…

Lastly, everyone’s least favorite subtopic of sex: the repercussions. Typical trips to space last anywhere from 10 to 440 days, which can be a wide range of time. However, what happens in space won’t always stay in space, this isn’t Vegas after all.

Babies (and STD’s) are no joke, so wrap it up people.

Safe sex is great sex, after all.

So this is weird, right? It’s not just me?

Whatever.

If this is something you think you would be into, feel free to donate here, to make your dreams a reality. The fact that they have already collected almost $235,000 from just 1,333 people in only 29 days is SHOCKING, to say the least.

 

So enjoy you little porn gurus, you.

 

May the force be with you… Or not with you if there’s no gravity, I guess?

– Alexa

Apparently Squats + Skinny Jeans = Hospital

Skinny Jeans and Squats Go Together Like #FitnessGoals and #InNOut.

Get it? They don’t.

Last month, a woman was hospitalized for wearing skinny jeans and squatting.

Yes, you read that right. A 35-year-old woman was hospitalized for four days after experiencing muscle damage, swelling and nerve blockage in her legs while wearing tight jeans and squatting for several hours, as she helped her friend move.

On one hand, how awesome is this chick for being willing to help her friend move. Moving sucks and I don’t blame my friends one bit for not wanting to help me pack up my home, so I could move up the coast (still on the West Coast Best Coast, don’t worry).

But on the other hand, WHO DOESN’T WEAR LEGGINGS! It’s a struggle enough as it is to get me to wear jeans in the first place (#LuluLemonSnob), let alone wear them to help someone pack up and move?! YEAH RIGHT! I’m not going to say she got what was coming for her, but…

Either way, skinny-jean-wearing-hospitalized-unnamed-woman, we hope you have a speedy recovery and wish you the best! Oh, and check out some yoga pants, you’ll wonder why you didn’t think of them in the first place!

– Alexa

Baker Mayfield’s Whip Though…

Best Cocktails to Order when You’re Dieting but Don’t Want to Look like a Priss

Let me start with a warning that this article is geared to anyone that wants to look hot while they’re drinking and after the drinking is over. You’re going to order that drink like a boss and keep you’re figure while you’re at it. No one wants to be the “I’ll take a skinny vodka Splenda yadda yadda.” Now, if you’re the person continuously waking up in a Taco Bell wrapper and/or vomit in your hair, my tricks can only go so far to help you.

For starters, here is a general rule of thumb: go for the clear alcohols. Darker alcohols, most of the time, contain more sugar that is harder for our body to breakdown. If you can’t think of some, here are some simple go-to’s:

1. Rum & Diet Coke (with lime)
   My personal favorite. It’s MY go-to. Ask anyone that knows me. Even Mr. Atkins himself approves of this beverage for his low-carb diet! This drink is zero carbs. If that’s not proof, I don’t know what is!
2. Vodka Soda (with lime/lemon)
   Sure, this drink may sound girly to some readers. But, let’s be real. It’s simple and to the point. AKA hard liquor & chaser. You’re basically taking a shot. Hardcore cred? I think so.
3. Tequila Water (with lime/lemon)
   Okay, you’re hardcore. There’s no time to mess around. Let’s cut to the chase. I notice that bartenders even freeze for a second when you order one of these. I mean, it’s hard to process those words coming out of my Barbie pink painted lips. AKA you’re now the genius that is dehydrating & hydrating your body at the same time. The guy standing next to you holding his “Coors Light” is cringing inside, since he now looks and feels like the priss. Or if you really want to face the music just go with the straight tequila shot.
4. Bloody Mary
   Spice it up! Doesn’t everyone know by now that spicy food can boost your metabolism? Why wouldn’t you burn some extra calories while drinking them?

 

 

This sure as hell isn’t a cocktail recipe book, but it is a few drink ideas to keep in mind in order to help you avoid any tight (literally suffocating in your high waisted jean short) situations. Take my advice or leave it, either way enjoy getting wasted!

XOXO,
– Hailey

10 Questions Everyone Asks You when You’re on a Diet

Hardcore diets are something I have experience with since I’ve been an athlete all my life and like to stay in as best shape as possible. I’ve tried everything from no-carb diets to a full 24-day cleanse. So, of course, I’ve heard every question in the book. Here are a few of the best ones I’ve ever been asked…

1. There is of course, the most simple and basic question:
   What are you allowed to eat/drink?
   Thanks.
2. The question only other dieters would ask:
   Are you on a fasting schedule? (AKA eat within an 8-10 hour window?)
   If you’re asking if I’m hungry, the answer is yes.
3. The question that reminds you why you’re border line limping into work: What is your exercise routine to go along with your diet?
   It’s called getting up and kicking serious booty at the gym.
4. The question people always seem to ask on a Friday:
   Can you drink alcohol at all?
   WHYYYYYYY?!
5. The question that reminds you even though you think you’re close, you’re so far away:
   How long does your diet last?
   FOR-EV-ER.
6. The question that doesn’t even deserve a response:
   Are you starving everyday?
   Oh no you did not.
7. The question you can’t answer as soon as it’s asked because you’re already off to the bathroom:
   How much water do you need to drink along with your diet?
   So you know the Great Lakes….
8. Another “Are you serious?” question:
   Are you having any side effects?
   Uhm, yes. I’m hopefully losing weight. Duh.
9. The “I spend too much time in GMC” question:
   Are you taking any supplements?
   Anything and everything.
10. And lastly, the obvious:
    What are your plans for once your diet is over?
    To become a Victoria’s Secret model, obviously. I’m ready for my close up!

All of these questions I have heard multiple times and they’re pretty straight forward. For example, the first few questions always entail what you’re allowed to eat and drink and what your exercise routine is. Also, everyone always wants to know if you’re consuming alcohol or what the limits are. Basically, if you’re trying to be good, you won’t be drinking (although that’s hard for the Irish in me.)

All these are great questions regarding diets. Just remember, you don’t have to go on some crazy no-fat, no-carb, no-sugar diet to reach your goals. Life is all about being flexible! Work hard, workout harder and enjoy all life has to offer!

Oh, and make sure to show off that rockin’ bod you earned once you finish putting up with all these questions. 😉

Until next time, B.

– Brittany